Feeling Down and Feeling Lost

I am now out of job. I had proposed to the company management of my intent to reduce my salary in return for half day and some other critical conditions. My immediate boss was receptive of the idea and promised that there should not be able problem with such arrangement. I was to start this scheme in August but my immediate boss requested that I start later as my 'successor' was away overseas. I agreed as it seems good to just give and take.

Meanwhile, there were changes in the business climate and the proposed salary change and half day work was rejected by my boss' boss. And thus on 31 Aug, my boss broke the news of the rejection and told me that the company is giving me 2 months notice to terminate my service. What was to be my resignation in July was dragged till now and it became termination.

I never thought that being terminated was too negative a feeling but now I fully understand what it is like to be terminated. I had contributed quite a fair bit to the assigned work and had many times sacrificed time and energy to get things moving but now I have been terminated because of business climate changes.

Immediately after 31 Aug, the number emails coming to me was reduced by almost 80%. And the following day, I also received the confirmation email from my boss that management is opened to my request for pro-rated bonus for the year but this 'PENDING' my performance and commitment during my last two months stay with the company.

It is such as a practical world isn't? The trust that I enjoyed from my bosses disappear almost immediately. There is no regards to all my past contributions and effort. Suddenly, I have become a useless and used person in the organisation.

I guess these are some of the reasons why I feel so down and lost. In fact, I feel betrayed and abandoned. Retrenchment, termination and other reasons that result in the employee being forced out of job is so negative and it takes someone with good positive outlook to ignore it with a small shrug. Its impact on someone who is pessimistic is tremendous.

Victory in life and even the market!

There is no reason for any despair or agony. No matter how cornered I am, no matter how deep a hole I am in, the knowledge that the Lord is there is Victory in the making.

No matter how convinced I am regarding this universal truth about the presence of the Lord, the next step to make it work is for me to work on it and keep working on it till the day I die.

If the Lord is for me, then who can be against me? Not even the market!

Just have to keep calm and do everything to build up my life spiritually, physically, mentally and monetarily.

Ok market, here I am and have come. :)